watermelonx's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- help!! k i m finally bloggin PROPERLY.. as in i feel tt i nid to blog.. n not blog 4 de sake of addn an entry.. i felt sooooo useless + helpless durin trg todaE.. de more i felt like winnin/playin better, de worse i play ahahaz.. but i cant stop tinkin of winnin/playin betteR.. den de lousier i play, de more helpless i felt.. den wen i feel more helpless, i play lousier.. haha sucks.. i reali felt so damn mei you yong.. n at one pt i actually felt like givin up.. gosh.. durin de past few mths i kpt tellin myself to put in my best n jus one match i acty had de thought of givin up.. sucks.. but i dun tink i will.. i gave up tt thought aft tinkin of how mani tests i scored badly coz oF badz.. de $100 i paid evry mth.. de taxi fares i paid to go all de wae to tamp., de no. of outings i missed coz of trg.. de no. of tyms i quarrelled wif my parents coz of badz.. blahzz.. i will feel so bu gan yuan to jus gif up.. den evrythin i did will all be wasted.. anw i felt so nervous wen i played todae too.. rr tt time i oso nv feel lidat.. n even though i didn erm win tt tym but i noe i did try my best to play well.. but now i reali tink i play like s-h-i-t.. n i reali wanted to run n get de ball.. but de ball doesn seeM to come to me or in fact.. i totalli duno whr to go.. n wen de ball comes to me.. i jus missed it.. freak.. tt suCks.. arghhhh.. i m pissed now.. n aft todae i probably gonna lose alll my confidence again.. i dun haf tt feelin wen i play now.. tt i can do it feelin ahahahaz.. ohh one thing positive abt todae.., haha.. my temper is not tt bad liao as compared to laz yR.. laz yr i got serious mood swings n ap lor.. like play match halfway i will drop my racket or hit de floor blah.. den will feel like punchin ppl one.. haha.. den veri easily get agitated.. den another thing tt makes me feeL not veri de happi is tt erm.. aiya cannot say here haha.. n one laz thing!! damn.. i got oral presentation nx mon! total suayness.. alwaes kena 1st batch de.. 3rd time liao.. n i duno y but i feel damn stressed n scared n worried abt it.. n i duno wad tO tok abt.. i jus noe i m damn scared for duno wad reason n i tink i gonna flunK it.. damn.. i still feel sooo uselesS.. arghhhz.. bloggin does helps.. i feel betta now hahaz.. more relaxed.. 20:49 - 05.05.04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Happy Bdae to Claudia Happy Birthday to tmr is tues.. yucks i hate tues.. oh n interklaz nx wk iziT? hopefully wun be on trg days.. *prays hard* dun tink i'll b bloggin tiLL wed? hahaz.. nid to study 4 chem cya 19:53 - 03.05.04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- slack slacked de whoLe wkeNd.. hahaz.. suppose to READ a bit oF chem but i didn.. gosh.. too laZi haHaz.. n i oWe a loT hW.. matHs, chem, eng hahaz.. ohh n tmr iS mon~! love mon.. lsns damn slack.. n trg in SCHOOL~!! hmmz.. jus wana ask a qn.. haf u evEr regReT stH soOooO muCh tt u duN miNd loSin wAdevA u haF nOw juS to tuRn dE tiMe baCk.. oh. n i stiLL caNt stAnD a cErtAin soMeoNe.. arGh.. 21:39 - 02.05.04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Labour Day went out wif some 2d ppl in de aftnoon.. watched starsky n hutch.. qt funny but i tink 50 first dates stiLL funnier n niCer hahaz.. aft tt walk ard den go home.. den i decided to take bus hM.. but on my way to bus stop.. i founD out i got some $$ wif me.. so i decided to go shaw tower dere to buy cds =D=D hahaz.. den took A LOT A LOT of postcardS.. is xia si ren tt type.. feel so paiseh hahaz.. tink i took 200++ shd b ard dere.. hahaz.. can last 4 duno how long liaos haha.. oh den wen i was abt to leave.. i passed by a cinema den dere was dis famous tw director havin interview dere.. so i kpo kpo went to c lor.. wah wad he said veri true n meaningful.. veri shen ao oso.. coz he is dose type tt film those chim chim no startin no ending boring artistic shows tt ppl likE me wun uds one hahaz.. den he was sayin if we dun support dose type of artistic chi shows den one day all de shows we watch will onli b hollywood shows which we would 4get wad on earth it was abt de nx day.. so true lor.. come to tink of it now i acty forget wad starsky n hutch was abt.. as in 4got wad acty happened inside n stuff.. coz its jus a normal show.. so de director was sayin sumtimes we have to watch a different show.. to cHg our lives as well as to chg de society.. sth lidat lar.. he say till too chim i oso dun reali uds hahaz.. den aft tt got dis small small autograph session lar.. den since i got $$ n de bk qt cheap so i jus bot onE n let him sign.. hahaz.. weNt hm n flipped de bk n found out tt i dun uds hahaz.. nvm.. shall read it nx time.. suppose to be inspirational n nice one hahaz.. was qt happi tt i actually heard de interview by accident coz i learnt sth thru it hahaz.. ohh.. n i was sortin out my postcards juS now n my bro saw.. n sinCe i got so mani i asked him to picK some.. n i was hintin to him tt he can write to ppl like his gf.. hahaz.. guess wad.. of all de postcards he took de heart-shape one.. hahahahaz.. oh btw.. he doesn noe tt i noe he got a gf hahaz.. coz..... i knew it thru readin his chat logs.. shhhhh.. anw.. his conv. r reali cute n funny lor.. hmm mabbe tts how p6 ppl express demselves.. so sweet.. btw.. Happy Birthday to 00:09 - 02.05.04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- argh so stupiD.. i cant bloG abt anythin i wan.. shit oh btw, did i say i quit piano liao?? oh i quit alrdy!! lalalaX.. but wad pissed me off was.. my mum acty quitted for me w/o telln me.. so wen de tcher said dis is ur laz lsn liao rite.. i was like huh den luckiLy i smart.. so i jus said yeah.. haha.. one more burden off.. lalalax.. n i can slp more liaox.. omg omg omg omg~!!!!!! i found out sth.. my bro goT stead!!!! hahaha.. shhhhhhh.. nobody suppose to noe one.. haha.. dun say out hor.. if not i die.. wah de way dey confess to each other sO damn cute n funny.. gosh.. i jus knew deY gonna like each otheR sooner or later.. tok everyday for like duno how mani hrs.. n he acty snatch de comp wif mE to tok to her.. oh n no wonder he's in a gd mood todaE... gosh.. p6 onli leh haahaha.. shhhh.. wah kaoz deir conv damn rou ma.. yucks wah kaoz.. i wan puke ler.. n die of laughter.. i gonna call my mum n tell her hahaha.. sorry a bit over excited ahha 22:04 - 29.04.04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Happy Birthday Jasmine n Shiyan! Happy Birthday to 21:40 - 28.04.04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- regret People seldom do what they believe in. They do what is convenient, then repent. Only in your imagination can you revise. Of all the words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these... it might have been. Regrets are idle; yet history is one long regret. Everything might have turned out so differently. As you grow older, you'll find the only things you regret are the things you didn't do. caMe acroSs a siTe wiF aLL thesE quOteS abOuT reGreTs.. n i sUddEnLy reALisE Tt . . . i hAf LoAds n loAds oF sTufF tO reGreT.. bE iT stuDieS, bAdz, fRieNds, fAmiLy eTc etC.. pErHapS iN De PasT, i diDn dArE tO bELieVe tT iT wAs mY foT.. haiZ.. EvEryThiN CULD hAf bEen sO damN woNdeRfuL n PeRfeCt.. IF i cuLd liVe my liFe ovEr agAiNz.. 23:16 - 27.04.04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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